I just found out that Robin Williams is dead. At the age of 63. Unconfirmed reports are suicide. Sad. However his life ended, the message that it sends is still the same.
Here was a man who SEEMINGLY had it all: money, fame, family, success, and health, and yet he checked out. Why? We will never really know why and I don’t think that is anyone’s business, but I believe that there are lessons to be learned from all shocking events, and there are 2 big ones here.
We can have all the apparent comforts of life, but if we are not ok with who we are….even a little bit….we will never find peace with ourselves. Mr Williams is not the first to teach us this lesson. Kurt Cobain. Phillip Hoffman. They taught us this, too. Guys who seemed to have it all. But did they? They may have had the material things, but happiness is an inside job. Somebody once equated it to showering with your clothes on; you can keep rocking the soap but you will never get clean; You can keep doing well on the outside, but unless you get some tranquility on the inside, all that stuff is just ‘stuff’.
Lesson #1. True and lasting happiness has to come from within. I know it sounds airy-fairy (and I believe in airy fairy), but you have to be ok with WHO YOU ARE at some level to find true peace in your life. It doesn’t have to be ALL parts of yourself….heck, I go in for a bit of self-loathing about some aspects of myself…but we are not going to find peace in external things. Now, we don’t have to be Mother Theresa, but how about affirming that we are good people, worthy, loveable, deserving, etc… I work on this every day. I don’t know what was going on inside Robin Williams, but clearly his pain came from something going on internally. I suspect that all the money and success couldn’t help him out of what was going on inside.
Lesson #2. The old saying, “don’t judge someone else until you’ve walked a mile in their shoes”. Translation: we have no idea what is going on in the people around us so try not to judge them. Sure, Robin had all the things that we equate with a complete life, but we have no idea what he was struggling with. Ok, I know, the Robin Williams comparison is a bit silly, but there is a lesson here that maybe we can transfer to our own lives. For example. There is a guy that I have to deal with on a regular basis who I can barely be civil to. He is nasty and combative and I want to kick him in the nuggets whenever I see him. But when I step outside my self-absorbed me, I realize that I really have no idea what he’s dealing with on an on-going basis. Maybe he’s got a cruddy home life, a disability, a huge stressful event. So instead of being quick to judge, I am trying to find some love for the person he is, instead of judging the person i see. People are complex little beings. We are not perfect, but we all need a bit of love. Be the person to give them that.
A part of my childhood got rocked today. “Mork and Mindy” was a big part of my growing up. It’s a bummer to see someone who brought me so much joy take himself out of the game of life because he just didn’t want to deal with it anymore. But that is/was his journey. It’s not my place to judge. He was dealing with something bigger than he could handle.
Goodbye, funny man. You were a great gift while you were here. I hope you find peace wherever you are at now.
Be well.
Sam
XO
samferris 
Mork has gone home to Ork. Genie is free. Peter Banning is finally living forever in Neverland. And we are left grieveing.
I was stunned. Like couldn’t breathe, desperately wanted it to be a hoax stunned. I grew up on Mork as well. Shazbot was my favorite word for a while. Back before VCR’s “This is Mork signing off, Nanu, nanu” were the most depressing words because it was the end of the episode.
I grew up laughing, but when I got older and realized what Comic Relief really was, it hit me that Robin wasn’t just the funny man. The man had a huge heart. I cried when I read about everything he did for Christopher Reeve and his family.
A terrible loss to everyone he touched with his humor or his heart.
I wish he could have conquered his pain and been free to enjoy who he was ~ an amazing person who made everyone else feel happy. Great article Sam ❤
I’m a psychologist in my country and I know depression is a terrible condition. Sometimes our reality is so terrible to face and sometimes our body (neurobiological depression) is making it more difficult to deal with… The matter is that there is one thing that have been known to make a difference in the recovery process; even with all of the pharmacological treatment and therapies it’s very difficult to survive without an adecuate support system. And I’m talking about family, friends, anyone that can be by your side listening if you need to talk, giving advice when you need it, crying with you without telling “don’t cry”, someone capable of being silent side by side, someone that doesn’t judge you when you say you wanna die, or look weird to you like you’re some kind of freak because you beging to cry in the middle of a funny situation. A good support is when you give or share what the person needs and not what you think he or she needs. Just like in Robin’s movie “What dreams may come”. It is not until he achieved to share his wife pain that she recovered and was saved. So if everyone of us could be a part of somone’s support system maybe there would be a big drop in suicide’s statistics. It’s good to know that we can do something. So let’s make the difference in someone’s life!